What Your Pregnant Friend Won't Tell You

Nothing beats the feeling of seeing this

 When you tell people that you are pregnant, everyone is excited. Your phone blows up with text from friends and family saying things like, "Omg congrats!" and "When are you due?" and the most common "Oh I'm gonna spoil that baby so much!" and it feels awesome to hear this. You feel like the world is your soft, cozy blanket that will support you no matter what.  These people aren't lying per say, they aren't saying these things just to make you feel good, they really do mean it. At the time.
Pregnancy changes your entire life. Your world is flipped upside down, backwards and thrown out of its orbit. Everything about you changes. First off you can't drink. No more parties for you. No more getting trashed and taking terrible seflies at 2 in the morning. Even if you could drink, you don't have the energy for that shit. You'll be lucky to not be in bed by seven.  Sure it sounds like fun going to your friend's house but when even walking to the bathroom makes you want a nap, you aren't going anywhere. The car ride alone makes your feel sick. Just the words, car ride, can be enough to make you say "Nope, nope I'm good." Due to your pregnancy, your hobbies change and not always the ones you expect. I've been a casual gamer for a few years now but even a retro 16, 32 bit game gives me motion sickness. Its not worth it. This means that my days are spent watching TV, cleaning and cuddling with a small, crossed eye Chihuahua named Squish.

I can't wait to be this big

I understand fully that people have lives and jobs. I do not expect to people to be at my beck and call but slowly, I noticed a trend. Everyone loves the news of a baby but no one loves dealing with the pregnant mother. When your pregnant your thoughts are consumed by baby stuff and endless questions.  Is this normal? How will this effect my relationship? What color should the baby room be? Is this the baby moving or do I just need to fart? You don't think about people if they aren't there. You think about the people who are helping you. Your husband, holding your hair back while you puke, your mother and how you told you that yes, it is normal for you to have such bad headaches. Your grandmother and the sound of her voice when you invited her to your ultra sound. You stop thinking about the people who ignore you. The ones who never check up on your, never ask how you are doing.  You stop thinking about them because they don't think about you. Maybe you made an effort to see them , talk to them or message them. Because you were close to them at one time. That's when you noticed the problem.

Its a weird feeling having people do this to you.

 Sure they always responded when you messaged them but how often did they talk to you? When did they message you asking how you were? Chances are, they didn't and it hurts. What happened to those supporting words and how they were gonna spoil the baby? Its good that they are happy in the moment but once the newness wears off, why are they gone? Don't blame yourself. This kind of thing is all too common. They say that when you go through bad times you find out who your friends are and that's true. Pregnancy is not a bad time in the way that some things are but nothing about pregnancy is easy. Its hard on your body, your mind, your emotions and your relationships. Some times you make the choice to no longer hang out with certain people, and other times they make the choice for you.

Its very annoying when people do this. It makes you want pull your hair out, or their hair out.

 Why? Honestly, I don't know. I have no idea why being pregnant repels certain people. Maybe they worry about you flying off the handle or getting sick in front of them. I don't know why its so hard to ask a pregnant woman how she's doing, if she needs any help or if nothing else just wants to bullshit. The weird thing is these are the same people that said how much they were gonna spoil the baby and how much they loved that your were pregnant. But once your out of sight, your quit work, you move, those people are gone. They only appear if you ask them first.

Our sweet little baby

Pregnant women notice this. If you don't make an effort to be our friend and support us while we are pregnant, don't be shocked if we push you away. Don't be mad if we stop texting or calling you. Don't get your feelings hurt when the baby is born and your find out over a Facebook post and not a call or message. Why? This is a why that I can answer. If you weren't willing to keep up your end of the relationship, your end of the friendship why should we? We have a baby that is more important, we have a husband that is more important and a family that supported us. You didn't. If you didn't offer support during the pregnancy don't be surprised if we push you away to replace with bigger, better and brighter things.